Showing posts from April, 2014

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.

This is something my mother said to me one time, it was one of those sentences that imprinted itself on my mind, I wrote it, I said it, I started to believe it. Those words are what helped me to start pushing myself to begin overcoming the demons that were holding me back from truly living. 
Fear. Fear holds us back, it suppresses our real potential. Hidden behind the safety net of what we currently know is a whole world of freedom, excitement and second-level living.  So many people are lost in their comfort zones. We become zombified in this state of ease... When every day is predictable and easy, when there are no challenges outside of the mediocre everyday tasks; we can all too easily slip into sameness. This habit of ritual is dangerous.. Usually this state of monotony is very safe, and causes no literal harm.. Just mental numbness. But when the repetitive rituals become unhealthy, that is when real disasters happen. We MUST break ourselves out of these comfort zones.. In order to …

Old soul.

It's 10.30 in the morning, and I've been up two hours already despite my call time not being until 1.30pm... I've had a shower, done some yoga, made coffee and eaten a delicious dragon fruit whilst listening to some beautiful music. I've finally had some space to myself and I feel reconnected. All the other models in my apartment here in Beijing that aren't already at work are sleeping; most likely until the last possible moment before they have to be at their job/castings. I am acutely aware, I am different.
Some call it 'old at heart', others 'boring/ too sensible'.. but it's more than that. Whilst most the people here are sleeping off the night before; I'm awake and alive with my thoughts. My life cannot be fulfilled that way anymore, getting wasted and 'pulling' does not equal a good time to me.. And I don't just think that it's age as a number, it's more about lives lived and the depth of our minds. I've often be…


Yep, hello Beijing! So Friday morning I touched back down in the big smog for what will be my second 2 month stay in China. A combination of jetlag and pure exhaustion from the chaos of moving the exact day of my flight; meant that most the time I had between castings and jobs was spent sleeping and getting my head together.. And it's not until now, where it is a Tuesday afternoon and we're driving from casting to casting, that I've found the headspace and clarity to write. Bizarrely, in the midst of a very busy day of appointments, I have found I have a lot of calm in my mind today. I've adjusted, not just to my new foreign home, but to the recent changes I've been faced with. And today I feel fine, good infact. 
I've found that I really don't need anything except the power over my own thoughts to create my happiness. When you can control your thoughts and are able to focus solely on the good, you can dampen any negativity in your mind and when you have a c…

Seek and you shall find.

I find it funny how in life, we all seek different priorities. Love, money, career, travel, security, adventure.. They all play different roles of importance to us.
'It's more about well-being than being well-off...'
This is something that I've been thinking a lot about lately, as my home life is rather up in the air and I've been feeling some outside pressure to 'settle' and to prioritise getting a place of my own.. And this IS something I want, really it is.. Anyone that knows me knows how much of a home-bird I can be, how I love making a place my own. However, that isn't something I want just yet.
Right now I also have this amazing opportunity to see the world, to travel and push my career and this ALSO brings me happiness, it is something I never knew would bring me so much.  It's much more than just seeing new places.. It's more about seeing more of life. Every day brings it's challenges and each time I learn more. I'm seeing the world,…